A piece of history has caught my attention. Napoleon Bonaparte – pronounced BONE-a-part, heh heh – has been featured on the Grim Podcast: Dark History Stories and True Crime for Mature Audiences.

I love Grim History. This podcast is the part of the Grim Philly Ghost Tours that I’ve been on during trips past. I try to go on a ghost tour in every city I visit.

Notable Peen-ish History

The Philly Ghost Tour was notable thanks to a bit of history that I learned about the high class ladies of the night and the invention of the merkin. Men of means only liked high class, educated ladies for evenings of pleasure. One of the ways that gentlemen were assured that the woman was a “true” lady was a substantial – ahem – “carpet” under the skirts. Whether or not the rug matched the drapes was of no consequence.

You see, women in this line of work would sometimes have issues with critters and have to shave down their carpets. Women who did not have a full and glossy rug were considered low class and diseased, and they found it difficult to make money.

Of course, critters have no discernment. Hair is hair. Lice is lice. Opportunity is opportunity.

Therefore, if a high class companion needed to get rid of critters, she would shave the carpet but would then place a merkin in its place, made most often of beaver fur. To mix metaphors, that is apparently why this body part is sometimes referred to as a beaver. Now you know.

The French Peen Episode

Now we get even more added value with this new peen-centered ear candy. What got my attention for the latest podcast episode was the description:

The conqueror of Europe was a passionate little fellow. Enjoyed oral sex. Wrote a host of love, sex, and amorous letters of torment to his love. And his penis now lives in New Jersey, by way of Philadelphia. Grim historians read and discuss the emperor’s love letters, love life, and the strange and wonderous journey of Napoleon’s penis from the hands of collectors, priests, and party-goers following his death.

I had assumed that Napoleon’s peen was secured in a vault…with him. <shrug> Guess not! Please enjoy this latest episode, Napoleon’s Penis and Love Letters!

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